he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
This is my gift to your gina
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
