So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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