apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
