Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Randomize
