i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
