I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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