That's intense
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
