You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
that's an acceptable place to lick
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize