Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
