brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
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