3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
