More tranny stories later!
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
