you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
that may or may not have been my penis.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
