The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize