you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I just got carded by a ten year old.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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