Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
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he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
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Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.