Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
