How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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