break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
