Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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