Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Randomize
