everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
This is the prime rib incident all over again
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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