kristin has been a bad kristin
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
