Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
