i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
