I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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