nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
