Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
