Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?

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  (603): Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background? http://tfl.nu/ypnh
  Replies (76) Good night (4730) Bad night (681)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.

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  (917): Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick. http://tfl.nu/czw4
  Replies (26) Good night (3511) Bad night (769)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step

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  (781): I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step http://tfl.nu/hwjf
  Replies (24) Good night (3378) Bad night (585)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.

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  (304): just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement. http://tfl.nu/6va8
  Replies (20) Good night (4763) Bad night (951)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'

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  (224): It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat' http://tfl.nu/0g9k
  Replies (12) Good night (1397) Bad night (3885)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident

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  (615): all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident http://tfl.nu/nfc5
  Replies (11) Good night (826) Bad night (4449)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card

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  (732): on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card http://tfl.nu/pv0m
  Replies (8) Good night (4268) Bad night (835)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us

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  (713): the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us http://tfl.nu/zpdd
  Replies (14) Good night (6874) Bad night (894)
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  (949): View more from California

  I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.

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  (949): I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that. http://tfl.nu/q7ek
  Replies (2) Good night (435) Bad night (854)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.

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  (506): Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second. http://tfl.nu/am2u
  Replies (1) Good night (1248) Bad night (701)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.

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  (778): Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town. http://tfl.nu/ynab
  Replies (4) Good night (835) Bad night (427)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.

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  (425): Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming. http://tfl.nu/qdqz
  Replies (1) Good night (869) Bad night (411)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...

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  (207): I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am... http://tfl.nu/bw14
  Replies (4) Good night (603) Bad night (432)
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  (209): View more from California

  The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult

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  (209): The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult http://tfl.nu/bmm8
  Replies (2) Good night (574) Bad night (400)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice

  (623): View more from Arizona

  You suck, She hit so hard.

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  (602): I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice (623): You suck, She hit so hard. http://tfl.nu/fozp
  Replies (0) Good night (312) Bad night (582)

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