Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize