i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
