marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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