I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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