she looked like the before picture.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
