be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
you made out with another girl for some wings
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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