Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
