This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
