Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
