how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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