totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
