Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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