I feel like abortions should bother me more
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
