Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
This is classic penis vs brain.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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