Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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