im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
