Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
