I wanna bring you to show and tell
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
