i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
