she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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