God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize